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Watch out, world!

11/22/2009

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Yikes! Two blog posts in one month!

You've heard of the quiet before the storm? How about the quiet after the storm? That's how it feels to me right now. The last few months have been mostly volatile with a few days of calm here and there. Now, the highs and lows have subsided, and I'm left with determination and hopefulness. Not such a bad outcome, after all.

I'm working on The Artist's Way, submitting children's stories, writing Dinner at Antoine's, The Battle of Picacho Pass, various poems, and a new project that will remain anonymous for now but is a lot of fun so far. I'm also thinking about the winter conference of the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators in New York and Highlights Magazine's Chatauqua conference next year.

And then there are archery and horseback riding lessons. These are two activities from my youth. Archery I never pursued, but became interested again when I saw the first Lord of the Rings film (thank you, Orlando Bloom) and I found an old wooden bow in a garage we were cleaning out during a Rebuilding Together SF project. The homeowner wanted us to throw it away, so I asked if I could have it. It is beautiful whether I can use it for archery or not. Horseback riding is another story.

I began riding when I was four years old at a place that offered rides on Shetland ponies next to a beer distributor called the Pony Keg. Figures. I loved to gallop, thrill seeker that I was. At five, I took English riding lessons from a very mean man -- that didn't last. At eight, I rode every weekend with an old cowboy, Henry, and he eventually put me in charge of trail rides. I was fearless. The trail ride that sticks in my mind was with an adult couple. A small plane landed on the trail in the desert, spooking our horses. I gave that pilot a piece of my eight-year-old mind! Nothing mattered except the horses and the safety of my riders.
 
For years after that, I took real riding lessons from Mrs. Dali Watley, the queen of western riding teachers. I worship her memory. She had us ride bareback to really become one with the horse, and it worked. She was demanding and brilliant. I loved her and the horses. One summer, my parents rented horses for us up at our cabin at Hawley Lake on the White Mountain Apache Reservation. We chased Indian cows when they weren't chasing us and had the kind of summer that kids never forget. 

Then years went by without riding at all until I went to work in Paris for a few months after graduate school. One of the secretaries had a horse at a stable and invited me to go riding. English-style riding is called a la française in France, naturally, and I wasn't any better at it than I had been at age five. The stable owner put me on a lively two-year-old and I didn't know what I was doing even less so with her instructions in French and so managed to get thrown several times. Mrs. Watley always told us to get back on if we fell off or got thrown, so I got back on until I landed against the wooden corral wall and hurt my back. They took me to a French hospital where they took x-rays with an ancient machine -- if I get cancer, you'll know why -- and gave me muscle relaxants, and didn't charge me a franc even though I was a foreigner. For the next few days, my legs felt tingly and like they weren't connected properly to my hips, but the real damage was to my confidence. I lost my nerve when it came to horses. I was afraid for the first time.

That is what I hope to regain by riding with a Half Moon Bay cowboy friend of my friends Fabian and Charles West. He also believes in the value of bareback riding, so we'll see. But enough stories for now.

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A Brand New Day

10/12/2009

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How things can change in just a few weeks...

Weebly has overcome its problems with support and I was able to publish this site after many weeks of waiting. I have a lot of work to do on my various long-languishing writing projects, but I feel renewed; my energy, creative force, and muses have come back to me. I am so thankful.

I've also realized that Facebook makes it possible to reconnect with kindred spirits, both long-lost and newly discovered, and express oneself in a stream of consciousness that, while self-indulgent to be sure, is a lot less expensive and, I imagine, much more interactive than psychotherapy. It's fascinating to see which comments, quotes, songs, articles - whatever interests me - is, in turn, interesting to which friends, and to find out what they are doing, thinking, feeling, appreciating. That interaction has woken me up from a long dull sleep, and I'm so grateful.

I am embarking on an unexpected, exhilarating, and, yes, terrifying adventure. I just hope my inspiration and courage can withstand the lures of familiarity and comfort. I know my loved ones will be with me wherever I may go. I am undeservedly blessed with their presence in my life. And when I am old, I don't want to remember my wonderful daydreams; I want to tell stories about what I did, win or lose, to make them come true.
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Writing in the Fog

8/1/2009

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I have mixed feelings about creating a website, blogging, and social networking. I guess it's important to develop an online presence and to network digitally these days, but it feels very exposed to me and a little presumptuous — like writing a memoir when you're 30. Then again, I doubt very many people will see any of this anyway, so what the heck. 

The weather here in San Francisco, especially the fog in summer and the rain from November through April, makes it easy to stay inside and write. Not that writing is easy, although the hardest part is making myself sit down long enough to do it. The inspiration usually comes. Sometimes it even feels like it's flowing through me and nothing exists beyond the ideas and the words. That's an amazing state of mind. I'm grateful for ever experiencing it.

I don't enjoy looking at a computer screen — it makes me feel ill after a while — so I may just have to write longhand now that I'm focusing on writing again. Does that make me pseudo-Amish? There are worse things to be. The Amish are the people who actively practice forgiveness -- remember how they forgave the man who shot and killed several of their children at school a few years ago? And how they comforted his family? They also believe that people with disabilities are born to teach us how to love. That is certainly true for my family.
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